He was 30 minutes late and I spent that time cupping my boobs while nursing a pint in a dingy pub in Islington, desperate not to attract the attention of the drunk opposite. So when my ex asked to meet up to do the grand swapping of belongings, I was quite keen not to go with a pair of giant fake freezing nipples attached to my boobs. You’ll make them rue the day they ever dumped you. You’re going to look hotter than ever before. When you break up with someone, you almost obsess about the moment you’re going to meet up with them again. It just so happens that this experiment coincided with meeting up with my ex-boyfriend for the first time since we split back in February. I hasten to add that this is a picture taken pre-meeting and in no way connected to the innocent meeting of old lovers and new friends. The main problem is they don’t stick very well if you try to reapply them.
